The diddy man is totally unaware that, in reality, this is a mischievous piss-take dreamed up after a lunchtime of booze by one Grauniad executive.
Specialist staff have been hired to help the high-powered audience stifle their giggles and wipe away their tears of mirth as Sir Diddy, (who blackmailed the city of Liverpool, mounted a coup d'etat against its elected leader and suspended the council's communications chief on trumped up charges, ed) takes the stage to lecture onlookers.
We have even been promised that his bete noire, former communications chief Matt Finnegan, will be at the conference and ready to confront the little dictator.
And now it's your chance to ask greedy Henshaw some searching questions.
Simply send us a comment with your question and we will post them on the blog and make sure he gets all the questions in time for his star appearance at the conference on the 26th of January. There's no time to lose!
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My question is: Were you really so arrogant that you actually believed you could get away without being exposed for trying to get rid of the Leader of the Council and the council's media chief in your own pursuit of power and personal greed?
Anonymous said...
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What have you done for Tony Blair that he still appointed you as Chair of the North West Regional Health Board despite protests from 7? senior MPs and umpteen Councillors and others and the resignation of a rising star junior Minister Jane Kennedy?
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What have you got on Colin Cover up?
- gary t said... Okay then,
my question to Sir Diddy Henshaw, evil being of this parish, is this: 'how does it feel to be the second most hated man on merseyside after former sun editor, sir kelvin mckenzie?'
- Jeremy Paxman said...
- Matt Finnegan said...
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I would like to set my question in context first by talking about blogs - more and more people are discovering how they can be enormously effective in getting some messages out to a wider public and exciting interest amongst the general public. They have even been known to attract the attention of MP's and leading politicians or a whole city. Blogs enable people who have been prevented by the mass media or gagged by their employers, for example, to communicate very directly with the public and ensure that people know all that they should know.I would like to ask Sir David therefore - have you ever thought of starting a blog?
- Observer said...
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What advice would you give to other chief executives to prevent what happ
ened at Liverpool happening again?
- Anonymous said...
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what was missing from the liverpoolevilcabal blog?
- 4:01 PM
Trevor McDonald said...
Aside from trying to oust the Leader of the Council and trying to frame your own staff, what was your biggest mistake?
Will you be repaying the millions of
pounds which your successor, Colin Hilton, claims your negotiation of the Liverpool Direct deal with BT has cost the people of Liverpool?
- Council employee said...
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Of the 42 separate recommendations made by KPMG to try and clean up your deal with BT, which do you think was the most valid? And if I may be permitted a second question: Will you ever offer a public apology to the people of Liverpool for the damage you have done and the millions of pounds you wasted?
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to Matt Finnegan
Do you mean this isnt David's blog? -
My question is
Sir Diddy, do you feel the postings on the LIVERPOOLEVILCABAL Blogspot, and all the other blogspots born from this, contain the truth or do you feel the points are untrue and unfair to you and your EVIL friends?
What are you going to do about it? -
Mr Henshaw
How much is your house selling for?
Can me and Colin have a private viewing?
Will you hurry up and go? - Mildred said...
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Where do you buy your cuban heels?
- Phil Hasitall said...
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You tried to sack me once, but I did your bidding and assassinatated numerous good charectors.
When will I recieve my reward?
You have left me in this shithole, please sir take me with you, the natives are revolting!
My smile is wearing thin! - Chas Show me the money said...
- Where's my money?
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- Charlie Parker said...
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Yes i wuz due sum maw as weill -when can i cowect my share?
- Anonymous said...
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Are you planning to grow a long beard and thick moustache any time soon?
- Sir David Henshaw said...
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Why are you all so horrible to me?
You all needed a kick up the arse and my cuban heels were nice and pointy just for that reason, what would you have done if you were in my shoes?
I did what I thought was right and mummy told me I deserved all the money and that I should threaten intimidate and generally treat people like the low life that they are.
Mummy broughtme a friend home one day called DOGGY STYLE, I call him Dr David, he has many friends some who smile a lot and others who keep asking me to show them the money.
Mummy told me that I needed these people to get on in the world as I could not do it alone because I am a midget.
Please stop picking on me or I will get mummy onto you all. - Mike Tall Storey said...
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Can I have my job back now???
- Nigel Ponsonby-Smallpiece said...
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My question to Sir Diddy. Can you stand up to give your lecture please....oh sorry.
- fellow cowboy said...
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Can you get stirrup attachments for those?
- Intrigued said...
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This is 11 am on this coming Thursday excuse me Friday right?
http://society.guardian.co.uk/summit/page/0,,1942542,00.html ?? - Prof Yaffle Chucklebutty said...
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Extract from the lecture found on laptop.
By Jove, missus! what a tattynefarious day, yes, when I was made Squire of Grotty Cash. Who would have thought it, from those dark days in the Knowsley Jam-butty mines to be elevated to such lofty heights. And that's not just my cuban heels. What a beautiful day for putting a shovel in your underpants and saying how's that for a Big Dig?
Yes when the good burghers and some very silly burghers of Lollypool, put me in charge of Chuckle Chambers I didn't want to leave this wonderful city with tears for souveignirs but to leave you feeling full of mirth and your spirits lighter. Well i was close missus I left full of murk and with your bank balance much lighter. Of course I am now a Knight of the Realm. And what a bloody awful night it was too. Arise Sir Diddy,they said, yes please I said, so I increased my salary.
But I couldn't have done it without good friends. And closest of all was Doc the Marmaliser. He helped me leave a great legacy, LDL. Lotsa Dirty Lucra. Where's all the money gone people ask. Well mostly to Charity to help a dear old lady called Beatty.
A shame I fell out with Dickie Mint over silly things like the Trams and the Cloud but when he tried to offer me a bus pass to go it was only Off- peak, an insult to a man of my standing (4' 10" in my heels) and I was not going to stand at the bus stop until 9.30 missus, not with the cold windy weather whistling round your knighthood. I didn't want my investments shrinking.
So i threatened to report Dickie to the to help the aged standards committee and they were shocked at what they found! Dickie had been trying topple me with his cohort, Mattymail Funniblog.
Dickie had to step down from his high office and finally look me in the eye. A new experience for me! But it was all worth it, i got my pension and my full bus pass. So I think the whole issue about standards in public office that can be learned from my time in charge of the chuckle muscle of merseyside comes down to one thing Happiness!
We all need to be happy and it's good to see that despite all the bigwigs driving around in their posh cars, they stil think of the less fortunate, like the Homeless and have, I believe, just invested some cash in Shelter.
So the Liver Birds still stand proud and so do the pigeons on the roof of the Town Hall and as i said to the pigeons on the day I left, lets stop all this silly coo nonsense. I did what I did to stand up for Diddymen everywhere. Tatty Bye everybody Tatty Bye!!!!
My first question would be:
What have you got on Mike Storey?